Showing posts with label Love. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Love. Show all posts

Top 10 Male Turn Ons

Thursday, August 2, 2007

by: Marisa Pellegrino
It is an undeniable fact that a man is powerless to the charms of a beautiful woman. All men, however, have a different definition of beauty. Regardless of how a man defines what he finds attractive in a woman, there are several common male turn ons that all men would agree to. The following is a list of the top ten male turn ons:

1. Women who leave something to the imagination

As unbelievable as it sounds, men often prefer to be teased with a little taste of what is to come. This would include a woman who dresses to show a little skin, but not too much. For example, a female who offers the slight glimpse of a thong or a bra strap is often more seductive than one who is scantily clad. Women who maintain a certain degree of class are always more attractive to men than women who openly share all their secrets!

2. She is not afraid to admit that she loves sex

There is nothing wrong with enjoying the act of sex, and there are fewer things more attractive to a man than a woman who can admit this! Many men have a major obsession with sex, so a sexually confident woman with a healthy sex drive is a big turn on for them.

3. She has a strong sense of self-esteem

It is said that the dream of all men is to have a woman at his beck and call; au contraire, most men are looking for a woman who can think for herself. Men are hugely turned on by a woman who believes in herself and has the confidence to speak her mind. Men tire easily of women who constantly need to be reassured. A woman with self-esteem is more challenging and keeps men on their toes!

4. She knows how to talk dirty

It may sound cliché, but men love it when a woman talks dirty! For men, hearing a woman describe what she wants sexually is a turn on. Women who effortlessly talk dirty are exciting and hold the promise of amazing sex.

5. She loves her body

Men love to look at women’s bodies. It is no secret that men love a great pair of breasts or a lovely backside. Moreover, men love a woman who appreciates what she’s got and is not shy to show it. It is difficult to be turned on by a woman who is ashamed of her body, but a woman who embraces her attributes will always win the attention of eager men!

6. She has an accent

You have probably heard this one before and you may find it hard to believe, but true enough, an accent is a male turn on. Regardless of whether she is from Scotland or Spain, her accent will be perceived as exotic to a man. It is especially sexy when she is describing what she loves to do in bed!

7. She has a wicked sense of humor

A woman who can be funny is very attractive and approachable. Men are turned on by a witty woman; one who can dish it out as well as she can take it! A sense of humor adds playfulness to the relationship and always keeps them coming back for more!

8. She is adventurous

Women who are willing to try new things and live on the wild side will always win the attention of a man. Showing a free-spirited nature is sexy and a challenge for any man!

9. She is independent

Men do not like to think that every woman is seeking a lifetime commitment. Men are turned on by women who can have casual relationships, without attachment. An independent woman is self-sufficient and free to have fun!

10. She looks like a centerfold

We can all fantasize, can’t we? Men know that the majority of women do not look like Pamela Anderson, but that doesn’t keep them from wishing they could hook up with one who does.

About the Author:
Marisa Pellegrino is freelance journalist
and a writer for a Montreal radio show called Passion, a program about dating, relationships, and sex. She is also the writer/webmaster for Dating Ideas (www.dating-idea.com)
a website with advice about dating and relationships.

Circulated by Happy Life

For A Special Anniversary: Renew Your Vows

by: Nicole Dean
Why are vow renewals so uncommon? I really don't understand.
Isn't it natural to go back to the place where, as a young
couple, you first committed your lives to each other?

In a world where marriages are falling apart every day, we
should celebrate the marriages that are making it through the
tough times. A vow renewal is a great way to tell your husband
how much you cherish him, and that you are more committed to
him today than the day of your wedding. Whether it is your 5th
anniversary or your 50th, a vow renewal is an amazing way to
recommit and reconnect with your spouse.

Planning a vow renewal is simple. All you need is your husband,
someone to proceed over the ceremony, and lots of love.

Choose a Location: Do you have a special place in mind? You can
plan your renewal at the church where you were married, in your
own backyard, at a park or another special location. Or have
the ceremony where you had your first kiss, first dance, or
where you were engaged. Be creative.

Inviting Participants: Do you want a small, intimate renewal,
or the large wedding you never had?

The Ceremony: Design your own ceremony. Have a religious
ceremony or a simple exchange of vows. Do you want to recreate
your wedding by reading the same readings and playing the same
music you had the day of your wedding or choose new verses and
songs that mean more to you now?

Write your Vows: If you're going through the effort to have a
vow renewal, why not write your own vows? They'll mean so much
more to you. Design them to include specific instances in your
life.

* "I loved you even when you backed my truck into the mailbox."
* "Back when I first saw you in college..."
* "I knew I'd love you forever when ..."

Involve your Children: If you have children, involve them in
the ceremony. Older kids can read the readings. Younger
children can hold flowers. You can also recite vows to your
children.

* "I promise to love you, cherish you, and kiss you
good-night..."
* "I am thankful every day to have you in my life."

Why not stand tall and announce to everyone in your life that
you still love and still cherish your husband? Tell the world
that your two feet are firmly planted and you are committed to
the wonderful man you married. What more treasured gift can you
give your children than to have them participate in your vow
renewal and for them to witness your vows to each other? What's
stopping you? Don't wait for your 50th anniversary. Don't say
"maybe next year". It doesn't need to be fancy or expensive.
Just do it.

Circulated by Happy Life

Feng Shui and Romance

by: Heidi Richards
Using the Ancient Art to Enhance Your Romantic Space

“If your love life needs a quick boost, you can use the art of placement to produce the romantic results you desire.” Heidi Richards

Feng Shui (pronounced fung shway) is the ancient Asian practice of object arrangement and space planning designed to bring balance, harmony and well-being to your environment. Its purpose is to enhance prosperity, creative, health and romance. Feng Shui fortifies a home with positive energy known as chi. The attainment of positive chi is both an art and a blessing to those who manifest that chi. The word “feng” means wind and “shui” means water, each one associated with a good harvest and ultimate good health or good fortune.

If your love life needs a quick boost, you can use the art of placement to produce the romantic results you desire. Relationships need the proper environment to grow. They need the balance of the five elements, too much or too little will find the romance wither. Here are some Feng Shui tips to enhance your romantic space:

The first thing you must do is remove clutter out of your romance area (generally this is the bedroom). That means you must remove trash, dirty ashtrays, dead plants and nothing should be stored under the bed. Dust and cobwebs on the fans, walls, light fixtures and ceilings should be cleaned away.
Enhance your space with romance colors, such as shades of pinks, reds and whites. Guys, this does not mean it has to be feminine. You can use maroon, grayish tones of pinks and whites to achieve the same results. The key is to not use any one color so much that it overpowers the others. Other good colors include browns, beiges, lavenders, yellows and deeper shades of those are appropriate.
If you keep flowers in the room (an excellent way to attract romance into your life), make sure they are always fresh. At the first sign of wilting, toss them out. Silk flowers are an okay alternative, provided they are free of dust. Absolutely no dried flowers as they signify death. Also, make sure the roses are de-thorned. Nothing prickly such as cactus, unless your goal is to break-up.
In Feng Shui a Relationship Alter positively stimulates a relationship. Designate a special place in your romance area in which to put items that will encourage a healthy, loving relationship. Things to include in your relationship altar can include a heart shaped pink crystal quartz, a pair of candles, mandarin ducks.
Use the Pairs Principle to encourage love. That means two candles, two nightstands, two lights on top, two potted plants, two pillows, two chairs, etc. The Chinese symbol for love is Mandarin ducks. They signify love, romance, fidelity, affection, and loyalty in love.
Your bed should be placed in the commanding position of the room. This is to permit the widest possible vision. The door or entry to the room should be easily seen from the bed. And the head of the bed should be against a wall or against a corner. If you have nightstands, make sure one is on either side (a pair) and that the bed is accessible on three sides to attract and keep a partner. The bed should not be placed under a window.
The bedroom is for sleep and intimacy. No one should come into your room without your invitation. There should be no distractions such as workout equipment, a television, things that would remind you of work.
It is good to hang pink (heart-shaped) crystals and wind chimes in a sunny window to attract good love energy (yang).
Pictures of you as a child, your children or other relatives should also be removed from the bedroom or romance area. This space should be reserved for couples and should only display pictures of the two of you.
Dim lights will give the room a warm, inviting feeling. No harsh fluorescents or high wattage lighting, here.
While this is by no means the ultimate guide to Feng Shui for Romance, it is a good start. These ten tips will give your relationship area the boost it deserves and your romance the fulfillment it requires. Altar your space and you will altar your love life. If you want to know more about the ancient art of Feng Shui, there are many excellent resources listed below.

Recommended reading:

Feng Shui for Love & Romance by Richard Webster

Feng Shui DOS & Taboos for Love by Ana Ma Wong

The Complete Illustrated Guide to Feng Shui: How to Apply the Secrets of Chinese Wisdom for Health, Wealth and Happiness by Lillian Too

Build a Better Life Using Feng Shui: A Workbook and Guide for Applying Feng Shui in Your Environment by Debra Michie

Circulated by Happy Life

21 No-Cost (or Extremely Low-Cost) Ways to Remind Your Special Other of How Much You Love Them

by: Brian Vaszily
It's so easy, as we race through each day trying to accomplish an impossible number of tasks, to forget about those we love. Soon, and often unintentionally, one partner, or both, are left feeling unappreciated, overlooked and in need of some serious "TLC."

Logically, we all know that a relationship must receive attention if it is to grow. Realistically, few of us take the time to fan the relationship flames as often as we should. But help is on the way.

Showing your special someone how much you love them doesn't have to take a lot of time or cost a lot of money. In fact, it's better if it doesn't -- it's the little things that we remember most. So don't wait until next Valentine's Day to show your significant other that you love and appreciate them. Try to incorporate at least one of these romantic ideas into your partner's day, everyday (and when you've done them all, keep going by creating your own, or repeat the cycle!)


    Cook them their favorite meal. Have it ready to go when they walk in the door, complete with candles.


  1. Leave a note for your special other (or tuck one into a lunch/briefcase) telling them how much you care.


  2. Try your hand at a love poem that includes special memories only the two of you share. Leave it somewhere unexpected.


  3. Make your partner a CD of "your" songs. Have it playing when they come home.


  4. If married, have your wedding vows framed and give it to your spouse "just because."


  5. On a cold day, warm up their car for them.


  6. Volunteer to do their share of the housework so they can relax.


  7. Let them sleep in.


  8. Pamper your significant other by running a bath for them. Include bath salts, candles, and soft music, then wash their hair


  9. Give your partner a massage (before they ask for it).


  10. Bring them lunch at work.


  11. Stop to say hello, kiss and hug every time you come in the front door.


  12. Pack a lunch and take your special someone on a surprise picnic or walk in the woods. Or, pack a desert and go stargazing.


  13. Flirt with them.


  14. Hold his or her hand.


  15. Bring them a blanket or sweater if they look cold.


  16. Tell them you love and appreciate them, don't just assume they know.


  17. Create your own holiday, then surprise your significant other with a celebration. This could be: "Happy 18 days since your last cigarette," a 2.5-year anniversary, or "I Love You More Than Ever Day."


  18. Leave a flower and a note on the windshield of their car.


  19. Cuddle for at least five minutes in the morning before getting out of bed.


  20. Buy them a small, but meaningful, gift such as their favorite gourmet coffee, a pair of warm socks because their feet are always cold, a book on tape for them to listen to while stuck in traffic, etc.

Circulated by Happy Life

The Powerful Secret to A Loving Relationship

by: Margaret Paul
Title: The Powerful Secret to A Loving Relationship

Author: Margaret Paul, Ph.D.

E-mail: mailto:margaret@innerbonding.com

Copyright: © 2005 by Margaret Paul

URL: http://www.innerbonding.com

Word Count: 656

Circulated by Happy Life

Category: Relationships





The Powerful Secret to A Loving Relationship

By Margaret Paul, Ph.D.



There are many factors that go into creating a loving

relationship. Certainly it helps if two people have some

things in common regarding how they like to spend their

time. It also helps if they have common values around

religion or spirituality, around politics, the environment,

abortion, and personal growth. It helps if they both eat

junk food or both eat organic food. It makes things easier

if both are neat or both are messy, if both are on time

people or both are late people. Physical attraction is also

quite important. It’s great if they have common values

around money and spending.



Yet a couple can have all of these and still not have a

loving relationship if one element is missing. Without this

essential ingredient, all the other wonderful attributes

will not be enough to make the relationship work.



This essential ingredient is about intention.



At any given moment, each of us is devoted to only one of

two different intentions: to control or to learn. When our

intention is to control, our deepest motivation is to have

control over getting love, avoiding pain, and feeling safe.

When our intention is to learn, our deepest motivation is to

learn about being loving to ourselves and others.



The motivation to get love rather than be loving can create

havoc within a relationship.



Let’s look at a typical relationship issue and see what

happens regarding the two different intentions. Jason and

Samantha are feeling emotionally distant from each other,

and they haven’t made love in a month. The problem started

when Samantha stated that she wanted to take an expensive

vacation and Jason objected. Samantha got angry, Jason gave

in, and they have been distant ever since.



Samantha’s intention was to have control over getting what

see wanted. She equates an expensive vacation with love â€"

if Jason does this for her, then he proves his love for her.

She used her anger as a way to have control over getting

what she wants. She wants control over feeling special to

Jason.



Jason’s intention is to avoid pain. He gave himself up to

have control over Samantha not being angry with him. He

hopes that by giving Samantha what she wants, she will see

him as a good and loving husband.



However, because both Jason and Samantha were trying to

control each other rather than be loving to themselves and

each other, their interaction created emotional distance.



What would this have looked like if their intention had been

to learn?



If Samantha’s intent had been to learn, she would not have

become angry. Instead, she would have wanted to understand

Jason’s objections. If Jason’s intention had been to

learn, he would not have given himself up. Instead he would

have wanted to understand why this particular vacation was

so important to Samantha. Both Samantha and Jason would have

been caring about themselves and each other, rather than

wanting to get love or avoid pain. In their mutual

exploration about why they each felt the way they did, they

would have learned what they needed to learn - about

themselves and each other - to reach a win-win resolution.

Instead of Samantha ostensibly winning and Jason losing,

they would have come up with something both of them could

live with. With some exploration of his financial fears,

Jason might have decided that the vacation Samantha wanted

would be fine. With understand of Jason’s financial

concerns, Samantha might have decided on a less expensive

vacation. In either case, both of them would have felt fine

about the outcome.



No matter how much Jason and Samantha have in common or are

attracted to each other, their love will diminish when their

intent is to control rather than learn. It’s amazing how

quickly love vanishes when one or both partners have the

intent to control. It’s equally amazing how fast it comes

back when both partners have the intent to learn.



About The Author:



Margaret Paul, Ph.D. is the best-selling author and

co-author of eight books, including "Do I Have To Give Up Me

To Be Loved By You?" and "Healing Your Aloneness." She is

the co-creator of the powerful Inner Bonding healing

process. Learn Inner Bonding now! Visit her web site for a

FREE Inner Bonding course: http://www.innerbonding.com or

email her at mailto:margaret@innerbonding.com. Phone

Sessions Available.

This article is free for republishing
Margaret Paul, Ph.D. is the best-selling author and co-author of eight books, including "Do I Have To Give Up Me
To Be Loved By You?" and "Healing Your Aloneness." She is the co-creator of the powerful Inner Bonding healing

process. Learn Inner Bonding now! Visit her web site FREE Inner Bonding course.

5 Tips For Successful Relationships

by: Kathy Thompson
Feel free to print/reprint this article in its entirety
in your ezine or website as long as you leave all the
links in place. Don't modify the content and include the
resource box as listed. Please send a note when it is used.
Thank you.

word count: 365
character width: 60


Title: "5 Tips For Successful Relationships"

- by Kathy Thompson
writing4u@faceuptoit-youcan.com

(c) Kathy Thompson - All Rights Reserved
www.faceuptoit-youcan.com


"5 Tips For Successful Relationships!"

"Love conquers all, right?" Well----it's suppose to.
But most marriages will end in divorce. Most of their
problems are about the children, money, or in-laws.
When couples commit to a long relationship, there are
specific personality traits they should have in common.
1. Similiar physical texture (thick skinned/thin skinned)
2. Similiar emotional stability
3. Similiar degree of tolerance
4. Similiar intelligence/understanding of situations
5. Similar Interests

Without these five traits, the couple live on difference
planes, different worlds. They are inclined to drift
apart.

Couples grow by adjusting to their differences, but some
times, the amount of the difference may be too much.

Love provides the reason for being willing to adjust to
the other person's difference from yours.

A frequent question is; "How do I know it's real love?"
The answer may be that when you are enjoying something
special - ex: a movie, a sunset, flower, song, and you
long to have your partner to share it with. The
degree of longing will determine how much in love you are.

Growth in a relationship should come from; doing things
together, allowing things to happen, accepting them as
is, and changing what you can. It involves sharing and
caring.

Couples usually don't mind working at their relationship
as long as they have a closeness to each other. They
don't want divorce, they want understanding. Divorce is
usually a rebellion at not being able to get through to
each other. The couple are still in love, that's why it
hurts so much to part.

There is a story of a couple who had been engaged for
seven years. The young lady didn't have the courage to
commit. They had their personalities profiled and
learned to adjust to each other's personalities. They
understood each other as individuals and their relationship
flourished.

To perfect your relationships "Secrets For A Happier Love
Life" is now available to help you. Get your FREE e-course
at; http://www.faceuptoit-youcan.com/ssale.html
Contact Kathy at; success4u@faceuptoit-youcan.com





This article is free for republishing
With 8 years of teaching and 15 years in
Toastmasters, Kathy Thompson really enjoys
writing and speaking. She has a B. S. in
Business Communications and has taught her
programs around the country at various businesses
and Adult Education Centers.

She writes and speaks about Health, Personal
Communications (writing & speaking), and her
unique specialty of "Face Reading" has brought
her plenty of media attention.

Kathy's goal is to help you be all you can
be and reach your potential.

Circulated by Happy Life

Infidelity Excuse: I Fell Out of Love...and just love being in love

by: Dr. Robert Huizenga

I find this dilemma rather common for younger couples, probably mid or late 30s and younger.

Usually one reports, “falling out of love” and is truly disturbed by this shift. He/she (and this is not merely a female problem!) wants to “recapture” those feelings.

This person has found a “significant other” who has stirred those dormant feelings and this person once again “feels in love.”

They are determined not to “settle” for a less than an ideal relationship, which means, of course, feeling the love feelings.

Here are some Key Points for this kind of affair. (The 6 others are outlined in my E-book.)

1. Unfortunately, our culture (movies, songs, romance novels, soap operas, romance comedies) teaches us that this is how it’s supposed to be. “Falling in love” is the norm – the implication being, that if it doesn’t happen, or if it goes away, something is wrong – with you, your spouse or the marriage. A good relationship must first unlearn a great deal.

2. The person who was driven to find “that loving feeling” (reminds me of a song…) usually experiences a high degree of guilt and conflict. He/she is often married to a “good” person and the desire to “find that loving feeling” seems selfish (which it is) and immature (which it is). Intuitively (and this person usually has a great deal of intuition and sensitivity) it is known at another level that he/she is not on the right path.

3.This person usually has a need for drama and excitement. Life easily becomes a soap opera. Emotional juice from the fall-out of emotionally intense relationships reigns rather than living life from the core of who one is.

4. There is little understanding, or perhaps healthy models, of the shifts needed as a relationship matures. For example, “falling out of love” usually happens when the attractors become the distracters. For example: His love for fun and spontaneity, which drew her initially to him, becomes irresponsibility. Her stability and calm, which drew him initially to her, become control.

5. The person “looking for love” is actually looking for the ideal, someone out there, who will project back to him/her that he/she is OK. No, more than OK, close to perfect.

6. This person needs to be adored, or think another adores him/her, because there is a lack of inner strength and solid identity. The other becomes my world, because I lack a world. Being “in love” is the panacea for my emptiness.

7. Sexual intercourse does not need to be a part of these relationships. Sexual activity may indeed END the relationship or at least move it to the point where the attractors become, again, the distracters. The idealized images may be held together by long phone calls, gifts, holding, love letters, e-mails, etc.

8. This type of affair often occurs when there is a “lull” in the marriage relationship. The responsibility of raising children, starting and maintaining a career, paying bills, etc. become the focal point for the couple. Romance becomes a foreign word. People are especially vulnerable for this type of affair after the children are in school and/or the oldest child reaches early adolescence. (There are good reasons for this, from a family systems perspective, but I won’t get into that here.)

Tip: If your spouse is struggling with this type of relationship, make sure you hold and care for your self. Your spouse does not have the capacity to do this for you (or anyone) at this point. Yes, you are ok. Her/his affair says less about you and much more about the emptiness within her/him. It is time for you to know you better. Model for him/her what it means to be a person with a core, with integrity, with boundaries, with values, with meaning, with purpose and actively figure out what your needs are, and get them met. Maybe she will ask questions. Maybe she will not. Maybe soon. Maybe later.

For more information on the different kinds of affairs, what causes them, the probabilities of them ending a marriage and what you can do about it, visit my site.

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On Saying Goodbye to a Drama King

by: Dalma Heyn
Charles left her, just left altogether with no satisfactory explanation. Just announced, after six months of a hot-house infatuation that had swept her off her feet, “Sorry, Miranda, this isn’t working” -- said it not even kindly, at that -- and said he wanted out. He wasn’t interested in hearing why Miranda thought that in fact it was working; that it was a relationship and relationships needed a little working out now and again. No, he didn’t want to hear it. For him, it was the end. Discussion over.

And he never came back.

It always seems unthinkable, this scenario in which a lover not only leaves, but leaves abruptly; runs you over like a train, as if whatever you had together was a meaningless diversion and you, well, you were just something to be left on the side of the curb like roadkill. In all my years of writing about love, this form of goodbye is the one that draws the most letters from readers.

Or maybe you weren’t dumped by a Hit & Run lover but are limping along with someone I call The Visitor -- a man who comes and goes at whim and cannot commit to anything other than a measly, “Hey, so, maybe we’ll get together a week from Tuesday, if I don’t have to work and if my mother isn’t coming into town? Or maybe another night that week, maybe? Or something? Whatever.” He’s someone who ascends on you for food, drink, sex -- and may or may not stop by again sometime soon, as if you were the owner of a Bed & Breakfast, and you run a good enough establishment for him to return sometime to be served and nurtured again, but only at his leisure.

How do you ever find closure when you’ve been decimated by a Hit & Run? How do you find love with a Visitor who can’t even commit to a definite date? How do you, a 21st century woman, busy and happy and self-sufficient and more successful than women ever were before, extract love and commitment from a 20th century man? For yes, these men -- I call them Drama Kings because they’re solo performers, one-man shows who still long for an ancient, man-centric universe -- still think the world revolves around them. They still think women are put on earth to please them -- but haven’t the talent nor the inclination to return the favor.

How do you cut your losses? I’ll tell you how. You pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and start all over again. You remind yourself that you’re lucky to get out. That these guys are exhausting and will always drain you dry. You are too busy, and much too evolved, for this nonsense.

You do not call the Hit & Run lover on his cell phone to locate him, nor to find out why you were so unceremoniously dumped. (You’ll only be humiliated over again. You’ll only hear the most chilling replies -- “Oh, it’s you. Um, yeah I know I left you on the side of the road, but I’m busy.” Or, “No, I really don’t want to talk about it.”) You do not try to make a Visitor become a grown-up man who can commit to something more than a “Whatever.” You remember one thing, and one thing only: You do not NEED this man. You have a roof over your head. You are a smart, darling, self-sufficient, loving woman who wants a smart, darling loving man. He is out there, but this one is not the one.

When you’re hurt by a Drama King -- of which The Hit & Run and the Visitor are but two of five types -- you’ve been hurt by a man who doesn’t care how he behaves. Who doesn’t care to become deeply attached. Like a skilled performer, he only pretended he wanted a relationship, pretended he was fit for love, but in the end, sabotaged them both.

So before we focus on your heartbreak, I want to remind you: Why do you always feel exhausted with Drama Kings? Because they sap your energy. Why do you always feel lonely in your relationship with them? Because they refuse to get close. Why do you always feel anxious and sort of weirdly needy? Because my friend, they aren’t giving you what you need. And never will.

So do not idealize him, and do not blame yourself. You escaped! You avoided spending more time with a love fraud! I once spoke with a woman who’d been dumped as unceremoniously as Miranda was, and listened to her litany of self-blame -- she’d “wasted years of my life” with this man; she’d “made a mess” of the relationship, she “should have known it wouldn’t work out.” Awash in misery, I couldn’t get her to rejoice in the fact that she had a chance, now, to find a man able and willing to love her back.

Today, though, I find women recovering quickly and not beating themselves up. Best of all -- I find them saying they feel better than they did before they wrestled with their Drama Kings! The hundreds of women I’ve spoken with over the years do NOT stay permanently depleted by these guys: In fact, post-Drama King, strong women only get stronger. They seem to have developed steadily, cumulatively, through their relationships with Drama Kings -- no matter how long it lasted or how dramatically it ended. It’s as if the adult woman’s self grows more resilient, more durable -- stronger -- through even the knottiest, nuttiest relationships -- just as a child’s self grows. Kids get through developmental difficulties by working through issues of attachment -- and so, I believe, do adults. It’s as though the developing personality is like kindling, needing to rub against another personality in order to create the spark that ignites the ever-growing self. That’s why you will move on from your Drama King ready for love sooner than you think -- growing ever more proficient at finding a man who’s able to share center stage; and able to love you back.

Avoiding a Drama King in the future requires holding on to the sense memory of what it feels like to be with one. You have to know your responses, and pay attention to them. That’s why I always ask women, Do you feel exhausted when you’re around him? Lonely? Do you feel as if you’re banging your head against the wall whenever you try to have a discussion? You must remember these questions, and any "yes" answers, because they’re specifically associated with Drama Kings.

One more thing: When you begin to feel sad all over again, and tempted to play the self-blame game, keep this in mind. An involvement so important that you wanted it to last forever is not a “waste of time” because it did not. Few relationships last forever, and the criteria for success have to reflect the realities of the 21st century. That year-long relationship with the guy you loved in college; that fabulous sex you had with the adorable cameraman from L.A. at your first job; those three days we won’t talk about with someone you shouldn’t have been with -- they matter, all of them. They not only familiarized you with different kinds of love, but different aspects of yourself in love. Most important, they told you an infinite amount about what you were working through at the time; what was irresistible to you and what was problematic; what developmental issues you were grappling with and what qualities you were searching for and trying to develop in yourself. As I said before, these relationships are what made you who you are today; they made you strong. They gave you self-knowledge. And they prepared you for a deeper, more intimate, love.

We must never, ever, devalue our effort at making love work -- to say things like, “All that work for nothing,” or “I gave him the best years of my life,” as if time alone were the measure of love. We must respect the effort and the time we put in. The measure of love is your capacity to offer it openly, and to have the intimacy skills necessary to have the connection that you crave -- and a man’s ability to do the same.

Most men have the same capacity.

I think that our attraction to Drama Kings, those men who haven’t caught up with us yet, men who have rigid, outdated views of love and life, may be hardwired, a built-in responsiveness to different types of familiar, traditional, masculine stereotypes. We can only move past our training by grappling with one or two. And we all do. And we all wind up exhausted and lonely and wishing we could find someone else, someone who is able to love. And then, stronger, more clearly focused, we move on.

There are fabulous 21st century men out there who know that love isn’t solely a woman’s job. They have learned intimacy skills. They know that 21st century women are very happy to please them, but that the pleasure must be returned -- that women want to be pleased, too. They know, too, that the days of standing by your man no matter what are over.

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7 Myths About Creating A Better Relationship

by: Cecil McIntosh
7 Myths About Creating A Better Relationship by Cecil McIntosh

In my private practice for over 14 years no matter what my clients have come to see me about, there has always been an issue about a better relationship.

Here are 7 of the most common misconceptions my clients have related to me about having a better relationship. These misconceptions are followed by my perspective on each one of them.

Myth 1 I have to love everything about my partner

Reality Check 1

You were born pure and pristine. You then learnt behaviors from your parents, teacher, coaches, church etc. (who did their best to teach you about a better relationship). These behaviors have become the backbone for your way of living and having a better relationship.

Perhaps a common behavior that irritates having a better relationship would be leaving the toilet seat up after use. This is merely a behavior and not the essence of the person. However, when you may consider this behavior to be the person, this destroys the concept of a better relationship, creating all kinds of conflict in your need for a better relationship.

Myth 2 Love means that I can fix your partner

Reality Check 2

You met your partner because of some special quality or charteristic that you admired. You need to accept and allow that quality to flourish in order to allow you and your partner to grow into a better relationship.

You may be unaware that you do not even like yourself. Yet by allowing your partner to grow and expand, you will experience the quality of your partner and the beauty within you, as you begin to enjoy a better relationship.

Myth 3

I am supposed to give up the things I like in order to be in a better relationship.

Reality Check 3

Giving up the things you like to be in a better relationship is like take a knife and cutting away a part of yourself.

Your better relationship is based on the uniqueness of you and your partner.

When you give up your uniqueness you rob yourself of a better relationship, your passion and your partner of your creativity.

Myth 4 I will be rescued by a knight in shining armour

Reality Check 4

You may have been conditioned to live your life expecting someone to take care of you. What happens if that person becomes ill? and is no longer able to take care of you.

Your responsibility in creating a better relationship, is to bring your passion to the table of your relationship. Some days you will be the knight in shining armour and another day your partner will be the knight in shining armour of a better relationship.

You will each get a chance to shine like star in a better relationship because of your strengths and weaknesses.

Myth 5 It cost a lot to be in a relationship

Reality Check 5

In a material context, a better relationship can be expensive if you think that love is based on the bigger house, car or boat. Although some of these material assets are necessary, they should not be at the expense of creating a better relationship.

Love is creating a better relationship by building a relationship that is based on the simple things in life, like walking and holding hands, going on a picnic (just the two of you), or sharing an ice cream.

Love in a better relationship is not about what you show on the outside but what you express in you heart. Love is not about money or materialism, love just is.

Myth 6 Love in a relationship is or is not a feeling

Reality Check 6

It is not what you say, it is what you do. You can say, "I love you" which may be merely words and no feelings (action). Love is the action of doing.

If you make a cup of tea for yourself, (the water is boiled), make a cup of tea for your partner. Whether your partner wants the tea or not is irrelevant, it is the thought that counts and the action that cements a better relationship.

Myth 7 I don't have to work at my relationship

Reality Check 7

As a child, you learned to creep before you walked. Then you learned the letters of the alphabet. In order to write, you had to learn how to put those letters together to make words and sentences.

These sentences then become the way in which you communicated.

When you and your partner stop communicating after learning how to use the letters of the alphabet in sentences, it's like 2 tape recorders talking to each other - Nobody is at home to enjoy a better relationship.

In summary:

1. Your partner's behavior in a better relationship is not your partner's true essence.

2. There is no need to have a clone of yourself. A better relationship requires some variety.

3. Giving up of your uniqueness to be in a better relationship is like throwing out the baby with the bath water.

4. In a better relationship there are no superior partners, just equal partners.

5. Love in creating a better relationship is not about money and the material assets (although there are important) but the simple things in life.

6. Love in a better relationship is active not passive.

7. Lack of communication crushes your desire for a better relationship.



About The Author:

Cecil McIntosh provides Relaxation Resources, that will turbo
charge your health, business and wealth. To receive your free 7
day Relaxation course. visit this site now:Relaxation tools and Tips

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Without My Wings!

by: Arthur Buchanan
This Brittney Spears song inspires this chapter every time you see my thoughts on this great song, I believe you are going to love it. When an angel loses his or her wings, do they really fall to earth? Can they make the transition to life like the one they have never seen before? Will the world allow them to enter it or will they be swallowed completely whole?

Some believe that their mate is an angel, I think they really feel that they are from heaven and are waiting in that special moment were they needed to be at that moment in time, or the time would have just moved on past and they would have never knew what love was like.

Like the movie city of Angels, you cut yourself just to see if you are alive. When angels cross over do they remember the glory of God or is all that is on their mind is the one they have fallen in love with. I mean every time they fall they feel so lonely, that’s when I feel a presence at my side that it is almost perfect, I guess I need you baby.

Without my wings I fall, I am so lost, I guess I need you baby, notice me, take my hand, flap my wings, strangers past my way. I love the strong, every time I see you in my dreams, is it make believe, or do I need love you baby, ever time I fly, I fall so far, I try to spread my broken wings, I fall so far baby, at night I pry, that you are with me!

That look on your face, you are in my dreams, you are near to me, I guess I need you baby. Notice me take my hand, a strangers plans, I love you stronger. Every time I see you in my dreams, it feels as though you hold me, I have faith. If I need to spread my broken wings, then I will know that you are going to be there to catch me.

At night I pry that you will be there in my dreams, notice me I can feel you baby. Here is the music, take my hand, what to believe, our love is strong I cannot go on without you.
Every time I fly, I see you in my dreams you look at me, I guess I needed you baby, wipe my tears with your broken wings.

I say to God you are the one for me, please Lord let them come to me, the life I live was meant to be with that angel you sent to me! How can I deviate from the plan? You let me fall for that angel that you brought down to me.

Here I cry and is it make me believe, now baby. I see clearly, what you needed happened now you seemed to move so difficulty. My love to thee, I give my heart to thee, my wings caused you pain I guess I need you baby, at night pry someday your face will fade away, I mean is it possible for angel to love a man, she could be my girl.

This is not a dream you are next to me, I flap my wings, a strangers plans, I guess I need you baby, in my dreams, I need you baby, Am I awake? Can you see, I see clearly, what have I have done?

Every time I try to fly my wings bleed for you, Lord please have mercy for I am falling for an angel, but look at me , can you hear me baby, at night I pry your face will fade away, I fill so small. In my dreams, you are haunting mean, baby guess I need you now, because we live in a city of angels,

In addition, when the time is right baby, God will give us our angel. That is when you ask, why me? I need you baby and if time could ever stand still, I would never take my eyes off of you, I guess I Need you baby, take my broken wings father, as I fall to my fate, heaven knows I cannot wait, I need you baby, we live in a city of angels can’t you see? That my blessed angel lives for me, I guess I love you baby!

Please know that you can share this article with anyone who you feel it may help. Just keep the footer in tact. Thanks:)

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Opposites Do Attract

by: Jan Michaels
I've come to the conclusion (and it's only taken me 50 years) that Opposites DO Attract!

My Girlfriend for example ... we have two very different sleeping environments. I like the window open while
I sleep and, at some point in the night, a sheet as a blanket.

Give me a fan at the window blowing fresh cool (my girlfriend said to add "cold") air gently swirling
(she says "Windtunnel") over me as I sleep.

She tho, likes the window Closed, the heater On full blast and 6 comforters piled on her ... One good thing
about this is that I don't mind if she steals all the blankets! Go ahead .. take 'em all.

And of course, theres the problem with turning over to cuddle up to each other ..
She complains of frost bite on her arms and hands, and I feel like I'm snuggling up with a space heater running
at full blast (To really understand this, read Elvis's lyrics of "Burnin' Love").

So, since we both refuse to sleep in different rooms (She Loves Me!), and there isn't any way to really
compromise, we both just have to deal with each other's differences ... isn't that what loves all about?

Besides, I get to spend every night with the hottest, and I do mean "Hottest" woman on the planet!


Jan Michaels is a self-described relationship expert (why is his girlfriend laughing?) that is truly in love.
When not writing amusing articles, he doesn't do much of anything really important, unless feeding the
cat counts.

You can see more of his musings or various and sundry humorous items at: http://www.brunkco.com
Or, you may contact him at: hiredgun@brunkco.com

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at your site as long as it is reproduced as above. You may
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This article is free for republishing
Jan Michaels is a self-described relationship expert (why is his girlfriend laughing?) that is truly in love. When not writing amusing articles, he doesn't do much of anything really important, unless feeding the
cat counts.

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Sensations Of A Kiss

by: Marc Lindsay

Sensations of a Kiss

Despite the relative tastelessness of kisses, they are usually referred to as
sweet. Tasting of wine, strawberries and honey are some of the most common
descriptions of lover’s kisses, although some poets are more creative. For
example, The Song of Songs says, "Thy lips drip as the honeycomb, my spouse:
Honey and milk are under thy tongue."

The feeling of a kiss is also described in a multitude of ways, The pounding of
the heart, quivering of the limbs, pain in the chest and quickening of the
breath are some examples of this. The Persian poet Ha-fez, writes that he fears
he will “char her delicate lips” when he writes of kissing his beloved.

The Spirit Within a Kiss

"At what else does that touching of lips aim but at a junction of souls?"

Favorinus of Arles


The Babylonian goddess of love, Ishtar, was said to hold life in her mouth,
offering spiritual delight to those who worshipped her. “That rarest gift, the
honeyed kiss of love/ On earth, is sweeter bliss than gods enjoy,” she tells one
of her followers.


Another example of the use of kisses as an exchange of life force or spirit is
in the Egyptian legend of Osiris and Isis. When Osiris’ jealous brother, Set,
threw him into the Nile, his wife Isis searched for his body in the river and
breathed life into him through a kiss.


The Renaissance saw a rapid rise in the view of kissing as an exchange of souls,
and as an offering of the self to the other person. Allusions to kissing in
poetry included an eternal kiss, a swoon that carried the couple almost to
death, and most importantly, the diffusion of one soul into the body of the
other.


Perhaps one of the most potent notions of kissing revolves around the belief in
its life force and vitality. The Romans particularly believed that kissing a
dying lover would keep the spirit in the body longer. Ovid, particularly, mourns
that his wife will not be able to extend his life with her love because of his
exile. Kisses could even follow the dead into the Underworld as a comfort to the
shades of the dead.


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What Flowers for Your Girlfriend this Christmas?

Wednesday, August 1, 2007

by: Natalie Aranda
A girl loves flowers regardless of how many times she has received them. Flowers show how fresh and precious your love is. Flowers remind her how beautiful and elegant she is. Love shines and flourishes like flowers throughout the year when you give flowers to your girlfriend on different occasions with meanings and thoughts.


Honeysuckle is a good birthday gift to symbolizes happiness. Red roses are the best flowers for Valentine's Day. The relationship you have with your girlfriend may affect the color of roses you buy. Carnations in red show passion and pink tells your girlfriend that she is always on your mind. Gerber daisies and wildflowers are both great selections for a new relationship because they are beautiful and bright. Red roses are usually reserved for longer relationships where the couple is passionately in love. Pink roses are appropriate for a newer relationship. Any other color of rose is appropriate as well, especially if your girlfriend is passionate about a certain color.


Christmas is always a hectic time and finding the perfect Christmas gifts for your girlfriend can seem overwhelming in a sea of shopping malls. However, a thoughtful gift that will be appreciated is flowers. The best flowers to give at Christmas time are orchids, holly, poinsettias, and the Christmas cactus as well as any red flower. The orchid signifies thoughtfulness and charm. Holly and the Poinsettia are two Christmas related flowers that are always used for decorating and as a result are readily available and a great gift for your girlfriend. A Christmas cactus is also a good idea and is a flowering cactus that generally blooms around Christmas time, although it can bloom at any time of year.

Christmas brings happiness and joy to every family. For moms and dads, it's the Christmas trees that call their children back to home. For kids, it's the Christmas wreaths that hang on their doors to tell the worlds that they are growing bigger. For lovers, it's always Christmas flowers and Christmas flower arrangements to show the freshness, beauty and elegance of their feelings.


This article is free for republishing
Natalie Aranda is a freelance writer. She contributes to Ecommerce Guide and Gift Ideas for Wedding and Valentines.

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Love Advice: Let Fate Decide?

by: Rick Valens
One of the most commonly asked questions, What is Love? What is its exact definition? Well, there can never be a definite answer. Everyone got his or her own answer to it. To some it can be really simple while to others, it can get really complicated. But one definite thing that is for sure, everybody needs love. It is a basic human need; we are not born into this world to be alone. It has always been our natural instinct as human to reach out to people, to be with and accepted by others. Consciously or subconsciously, everyone is searching and waiting for that special someone to appear in his or her life.

But where and when will this special someone appear? For all you may know, he or she could be just nearby or even just beside you. It all depends on fate a lot would say. Fate? Well fate is again, something that cannot be explained, something that is always so amazing. Think about it. Among the millions and millions of people who could be out there, why is it that you had somehow met your friends to later become the best of friends? Got retrenched, feeling so terrible and disappointed but to later find your love among your new colleagues in your new job? Life has just suddenly become so beautiful?
Well, this is indeed a very true encounter of a friend of mine. Hmm… thinking about it, isn’t there also kind of a fate between you and me that you are actually reading this article right now? Everything is like all so miraculously arranged, having a reason behind every event that happened.

Do you believe in fate? Personally I definitely do. But again, are we really going to be just sitting around doing nothing, waiting for fate to just come by? Well, I wouldn’t think so. If you are not going to help yourself, who is going to? Fate has always been around us. As long as we are in places where there are people, presence it may be. Many at times, it had actually been there but somehow we just didn’t realized and cherished it when it was there. Sad to know of it, isn’t it so? Well, sometimes we were just too obsessed with our works, dreams and nevertheless too high an expectation that we missed to see it, to cherish that someone who was all along just beside us. It is only too late to realize it now, an opportunity won’t drop by twice. Your happiness lies in your own hand, don’t live your life a regret. I am sure you wanna have a life that is so full of fond memories than with tons of regrets, don’t you? Think about it.

Let us just open up ourselves shall we? Everyday is a beautiful day, stop burying yourself with that tons of endless work. Make time for yourself, reach out, make more friends, make new friends, widen up your social circle, live a balanced healthy social life. Make life enjoyable; you will see things in a more different way. You might be going, “Hmm… why is it that all this while, I have never noticed that she is actually such a pretty girl.” Well, in fact this is how true love comes about. It doesn’t always have to be a love at first sight, to be attracted to his or her physical look. Sometimes it is through an initial friendship, enjoying the companion of one another that along time, you discover the beauty of his or her inner human qualities, unknowingly falling in love with the person. Wouldn’t this be a more beautiful and meaningful love than to a love at first sight?

Remember, love has always been a game ever awaiting your participation. Just as in life, it is a game of chance; if you never try you can never win. Well if you did not find your love today, be disappointed do not. It is just like missing the last boat leaving the dock.
There will always be another one to pick you up the next morning? And always will there be.

Now, another boat is getting ready to set off soon. To the land of great romance and opportunities it will sail. The question is, will you board it?

Rick Valens
Staff Writer for http://www.loveletterbox.com ,
Love Relationship Discussion Forum

Currently also freelance writer for http://www.ecemetery.org,
Monument of Eternal Memory

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Here Comes the Sun (Signs) - Romance, Astrology and You

by: Heidi Richards
"Your sun sign can tell a lot about you as a lover. It can help you explore how you approach your romantic love interests." Heidi Richards Is it easy for you to get close to someone or do you take your time in developing meaningful relationships? What does your partner bring to your relationship that either helps it blossom or keeps it from going anywhere? Are you finding love elusive or does it come easy? How do you relate to those you are romantically attracted to? What kind of relationship are you looking for? What kind of partner are you seeking? While reading about your sun sign is not the entire answer to the age-old challenge of finding the right partner, it can be a start. Your sun-sign is only one aspect of your persona, what makes you, you. Your Rising and Moon also determine the life you were born to lead. Romance, Astrology and You will shed some light on sun signs and romance. Beyond that, you may wish to you seek professionals who can prepare your chart and give you a more in-depth personality/life reading.

The signs are divided into the four elements which represent them. They are the elements of Fire, Earth, Air and Water. This first page covers the Fire signs - Aries, Leo and Sagittarius. The Earth signs - Taurus, Virgo and Capricorn are on the next page, Air signs - Gemini, Libra and Aquarius, the next and the last page is dedicated to the Water signs – Cancer, Scorpio and Pisces.

Fire Signs

Fire signs represent enthusiasm and energy. The hallmark of fire is inspiration. With a joy for life, they can be ardent, forceful and have a tendency to be extremely impulsive.

ARIES - (March 22 - April 20). Aries is ruled by Mars, and its symbol is the Ram. Aries is a Fire sign, impulsive and energetic. You are bold and impatient, easily infatuated, and often lose interest if boredom sets in. You tend toward impulsive rather than cautious when it comes to matters of the heart, making your interest known (sometimes too quickly), and you tend to be very direct – shy is not a word to describe the impetuous Aries. You quickly bounce back from rejection, although it isn’t something you are use to, as you like to get your way. Quips and quarrels are often seen as foreplay with the direct Aries. You like the conquest in romance and can play "hard-to-get". You find it stimulating when the object of your affection plays the same game. However, in the long run you love to let yourself be caught, to be "swept away" with desire. You gravitate toward the confident, rather than those who appear needier. Aries loves to be caressed and told that you are the best.

LEO - (July 23 – August 22) Leo is ruled by the Sun and its symbol is the lion. As a Fire sign, Leo’s world revolves around the principles of identity and drama. You love to be the center of your partner’s adoration and attention. You tend to be flamboyant and melodramatic when it comes to matters of the heart. You crave attention and find ways to announce that you have arrived, whether it be with a look, the way you “waltz” into a room, the way you toss your head or even the way you walk up to someone and give them a gentle touch. You are a true romantic and have been known to write a poem or two. You have style, are generous and love to “surprise” the object of your affection with flowers and candy. In fact, surprises are second nature to you. You often sport an aristocratic air, even if you weren’t born into nobility. You love to be adored and admired and taking the lead in romance gives you a sense of power. You expect to be respected, and will act worthy of respect with one you desire. You know how to turn on the charm and raise the heat in a relationship. Leos love to be touched and admired.

SAGITTARIUS - (November 22 – December 21) Sagittarius is ruled by Jupiter and is symbolized by the archer. This Fire sign is connected with the identity. You crave variety, new ideas, and new experiences. In fact, you can be a little "excessive," which means you can over-do things a bit - or a lot. You love to explore new places, people and foods. Change is something you simply cannot live without. Routine is not a word that sits well with you and anyone romantically interested in the archer better be ready for adventure. You are a truth seeker, love to learn and your interests are eclectic and varied. You tend to embellish things a bit (almost to the point of exaggeration) especially when it comes someone who might be attracted to you. You want them to find you as interesting as you find life itself. You love your "space" and freedom and want your partner to feel the same. You find independence in others as sexy as it is second nature to you. Playful dates are a real turn-on for someone seeking a good-time. When it comes to love-interests, you want to be "friends first". Honesty is paramount to you and you expect it from those in your life, especially your mate. You can be philosophical one moment and class clown the next. You are very jovial and will seek a partner who makes you laugh. When it comes to spirituality, you consider yourself a guide along the long and winding road to self-discovery. And when in the learning mode, the Sagittarius will be a "seeker" or student to those who can teach or inspire you. Sagittarians are as turned-on by a stimulating conversation as they are by sensual exploration.


Earth signs are physical and have to do with primarily material affairs. They are natural and their feet tend to be firmly planted on the ground, "earthy" types. The hallmark of earth signs is practicality. TAURUS - (April 21 – May 21) Taurus is ruled by Venus and its symbol is the bull. Taurus is an Earth sign which is connected with fruitfulness and stability. You love luxury and sensual comforts such as silky satin sheets, robes fit for a king or queen and beautiful surroundings. You seek comfort, security and beauty. A perfect romance to you is one that is harmonious and beautiful, even if a bit materialistic. Because of your fondness for pretty things, you will proudly display your possessions and purchasing power. You are easygoing, calm, and comfortable to be around. You enjoy sharing "quiet times" with your love interest and also get excited about everyday activities such as shopping and cooking and dining. You tend to be stubborn and will do whatever you can to get what you want. When it comes to showering affection on the object of your desire, you enjoy physical contact. You have a very sensual nature and appreciate the pleasures of food, art, music, perfumes, fondling, or sex. Because you appreciate nature; a walk in the woods, hiking and rock-climbing may be considered exciting dates. You also love sunsets camping, gardening and simply being outdoors and can be attracted to those who are equally down-to-earth and outdoorsy. As long as your partner or mate displays the qualities of loyalty and honesty qualities which you likely possess, they will have your undying loyalty and a relationship destined to endure.

VIRGO - (August 23 - September 22) Virgo is ruled by Mercury and is symbolized by the Virgin. As an Earth sign, Virgo is connected with material things and practicality. The ultimate organizer, you gravitate toward anything that puts your analytical mind to use. To the outside world you may appear reserved and tend to hold back your emotions, when it comes to love, it’s no holds barred for the loving Virgo. You display great attention to detail which can be considered good fortune or a curse when it comes to relationships. You are good at remembering your partner’s desires (even those that were only mentioned in passing) and love to cater to those desires. To you, organizing the object of your affections is considered “flirting.” Your favorite role is to be of help and service to friends and partners. You are witty, perceptive and logical. Your reasoning powers help you to resolve conflicts easily and quickly taking your romance to new depths. You need a partner who will help you loosen your cautious shy nature. You are a good listener and communicator, an important aspect in romance. You love to “fuss” over your partner and can sometimes be seen as critical. Your partner should know though, that if you were not interested, you would not work so hard to help your love interest be “all he or she can be.” Good health is of great concern to you and you work hard to take care of yourself. You aim to please and when it comes to love you fall hard. Virgos are most attracted to those who keep themselves physically fit.

Capricorn – (December 22 - January 20) Capricorn is ruled by Saturn and is symbolized by the sea goat. As an Earth sign, Capricorn is motivated, determined and sets practical goals. Taking unnecessary risks is not your “thing,” even in the area of romance. You are ambitious and responsible. You will, however do “whatever it takes” to get what you want. Social status, reputation, position, and career are important to you. You use these to impress and attract the object of your desires. When it comes to love, no silly games for you, you prefer a more mature approach to courtship. Glamour and dazzle are more your style – so an evening that starts out in a limousine would be perfect. You are supportive and dependable, good qualities in any relationship. Security, a good home, and the finer things in life are what you strive for. You do not shy away from commitment, as long as it is with the right person – in fact you "play for keeps" and will be forever faithful. Some might consider you a loner, but do not be fooled by the aloof Capricorn. You are longing for a deep, meaningful relationship with just the right partner. Capricorns can be as powerful in the bedroom as they are in the boardroom, so lovers beware. You are seen by your peers as a “winner” and often attract the same. When it comes to romantic adventures, you are both practical and romantic so a perfect getaway for you could include both work and play.


Air signs have a great deal to do with relationships and intellect and are gatherer knowledge using their intuition and the head. They are known for getting what they desire and achieving their goals. Their hallmark is making a difference in the world, whether it be in their own circle of influence or something much larger.

Gemini - (May 22 – June 21) Gemini is ruled by the planet Mercury and is symbolized by the Twins. An Air sign, Gemini is connected with communication. You have a way with words. You're good at flirting and teasing, and can be a real sweet talker. Because of your “twins” influence you are clever at adapting your style to suit the seduction. You can be witty and clever and easily are attracted to good conversationalists. You love the power of suggestion and using double entendres. In fact, you use them proficiently when you are flirting with others, whether they be romantic interests or just passing fancies. You adapt easily to most situations and love to share stores of people, places and experiences, which you skillfully use to arouse the interest of one you desire. Because you are so tuned into communicating, you can see both sides of a situation. You know there are always at least three sides to every conflict. The sides of each party involved and the truth; which you have a knack for discovering. You can be a prolific writer. Love letters, poetry and notes are easily used to seduce the object of your affection. And mind games are beyond your realm of romantic antics. Internet chat rooms and forums stir your interest. Who knows, you may even find your future mate online. You have been known to give “good phone,” and enjoy long conversations that revolve around romance and sexual innuendos. Flirting is second nature to you and you are almost shameless when it comes to practicing your flirting style. Because of their sometimes short attention span, Gemini lovers are more likely stay around if they feel mentally stimulated.

Libra - Romantic. (September 23 – October 23) Libra is ruled by Venus. An Air sign, Libra is connected with social relationships and its symbol are the scales. Known as a diplomat to those closest to you, you have an incredible sense of objectivity and seek harmony and balance in relationships and life. Happiest when you are in love, you can be sweet and sensitive. You love talking about things relating to love and romance such as novels, movies or songs. It is your way of flirting with the object of your desires. You are a charming, gracious and considerate lover and can adapt your style to attract the one you desire. In fact, you like to be partners in most aspects of life and will find ways of including those you love and admire in your plans, whether it be at work, home or play. Although crowds of people don’t seem to bother you, you prefer spending time with your love interest alone rather than in a group setting. You may start out at a big gala affair, but will look for an appropriate time to get away so the two of you can spend time alone together. You are a thoughtful partner and lover and give your full attention to your mate. Giving your undivided attention is your way of flirting. You have a keen interest in others and can lend an ear or a shoulder to cry on. You love courting and or being courted by the object of your affection. Hearts and flowers go a long way in the romance arena of your life. Librans do not like to be manipulated, fair play is an absolute must.

Aquarius - (January 21 – February 21) Aquarius is ruled by Uranus. An Air sign, Aquarius is very social, and is symbolized by the water bearer. An inventor at heart, you can be seen by others as a little “quirky,” often gravitating toward the future and progress of humankind. You are considered a visionary and open-minded looking for less conventional ways of being and doing than the other signs. You don’t generally break down under peer pressure; you prefer to be different from others. You are highly liked and surrounded by friends because you know how to be one. A humanitarian, you long for social reform and prefer those who share your thoughts on life over those who easily conform to societal pressures. You tend to be more attracted to the outrageous than one who looks and act like everyone else. You are sometimes thought of as a “rebel with a cause” and will be attracted to a partner who you shares your desire to change the world. You are a free spirit who needs his or her own space, but don’t mind sharing that space with the object of your affection, as long as you don’t get pushed into a corner. You enjoy sharing your vision of the future with the one you desire and consider it your way of flirting. Sometimes you appear aloof or unemotional, which can be a turn-off for some. Not to worry, the right person will find it attractive and be curious to know what lies beneath that detached exterior. It seems an odd way to "flirt", but it can be attractive to those who are curious and have a similar demeanor. It is the game of “intrigue” that can often turn someone on and make them want to know more. The Aquarius is a creative and imaginative in lover and will often seduce the object of their desire in unusual ways (and places).


Water signs are reflective, responsive and whose nature is toward abundance, sometimes excess. Their hallmark is their emotional, expressive nature. Cancer – Caring - (June 22 – July 22) Cancer is ruled by the Moon and its symbol is the crab. It is a Water sign, and as such is connected to the world of emotion and the instincts. People react in a positive way to your sensitive intuitive nature. If it’s a love interest you are after, you instinctively know how to get the attention you desire. Because you are a good friend and confidante, people have a tendency to confess their sins to you. When it comes to flirting you prefer a more demure or reserved approach to one that is overt. You are a caring, nurturing lover and enjoy cuddling and hand-holding. You may seduce the object of your desire with a home-cooked meal of fare that is fit for a king or queen. You tend to fuss over the object of your affections, a clear indication that you are interested in pursuing the relationship further. Pampering and affection are your signatures in romance. You are also very protective of your love interests (all relationships for that matter) and will go to the ends of the earth to make those in your life feel safe and secure. Family is important to you and you enjoy sharing family traditions as well as starting those of your own creation. For you, home is where the heart is. A Cancerean in full courtship mode will invite their love interest to meet the family. You make those you love feel like the center of the universe.

Scorpio - (October 24 – November 21) Scorpio is ruled by the planet Mars and is symbolized by the scorpion. As a Water sign it is connected with the world of emotions. You can be intently focused, even absorbed on the object of your desire. You are send by others as sultry, emotional and even a "dangerous". Your passionate nature can smolder for days, weeks and even months and then it all of the sudden erupts into a volcanic fire that is almost impossible to contain. You have a sexy animal magnetism" that can subtly seduces the object of your desires. There is a mesmerizing way about you; when you look into the eyes of your love it is as though you are looking deep into their soul. You are a born detective and will go to almost any lengths to find out about someone to whom you have an interest in. You are intense and emotionally perceptive. When hurt, you don’t mend easily and don’t forgive quickly (if ever). You know how to channel your energy and power into exploring your lover’s sexuality. You are intuitive and inquisitive; there are no secrets you won’t discover. However, your nature is such that you may keep a few secrets of your own. Ever resourceful and self-confident, you know what’s best for you and think you know what’s best for others. Sex with a Scorpio is anything but subtle, it is full of energy, daring and can even involve some risk taking. You are looking for a fearless lover, one willing to create a romance that will unleash your passions.

Pisces - (February 22 – March 21) Pisces is ruled by the planet Neptune , and its symbol is two fish bound together. Pisces is a water sign, emotional and compassionate. You have an air of mystery and love a good secret. You love affairs of the heart and could become involved in a love tryst or steamy affair. You can be shy or coy, and your sensitive side and air of vulnerability can and will often work to your advantage to attract the object of your desires. You love romance and fantasy and sometimes have a hard time separating the two. You are able to share your deepest feelings with the one you love and often connect on a soul level. It is said the eyes are the window to the soul and you often find yourself flirting with your eyes. Pisces men are often seen as gallant (opening doors, and offering a hand) and both sexes can be self-sacrificing often putting the needs of their lover ahead of their own. You tend to daydream and often have your head in the clouds. You would rather go with the flow than ruffle feathers. You love to serve your lover and shower him or her with delightful fantasies. You have a spiritual nature, and are very creative. When it comes to romance, you can be unpredictable and truly enjoy the game of love, although you will pursue the object of your affection with slow, careful intent.

About the author: © 2004 - Heidi Richards is the author of The PMS Principles, Powerful Marketing Strategies to Grow Your Business and 7 other books. She is also the Founder & CEO of the Women’s ECommerce Association, International www.WECAI.org (pronounced wee-kī) – an Internet organization that “Helps Women Do Business on the WEB.” She can be reached at www.HeidiRichards.com.

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Finding Your Ideal Partner?

by: Rick Valens
How would you describe the ideal girl of your dream?

“Oh, she has got to be beautiful with a nice figure, having a sweet and sexy voice, cheerful, gentle, considerate, kind-hearted, understanding, independent, musically inclined, share a common interest of mine, hmm… knows how to prepare nice food and… ”

Ok, that is enough. Now, do you think such a perfect person actually exists? Well maybe yes maybe not. But if everyone were to nevertheless, really have such a high expectations, love is certainly going to be hardly visible in the air. Don’t you think so too?

So, what makes an ideal partner then? Well before we go on, perhaps it might be good to know what an exact ideal partner are we discussing here? A dating partner or a marriage partner? Or has this question never even occurred to you before?

Ok, let us answer the question again separately. Hmm… maybe we shall get the girls to answer this time.

First question: How would you describe an ideal dating partner?

Common answers would include, “Dashing with a nice body, full of gentlemanliness, caring and considerate, having a good sense of humor, cheerful, fun loving, adventurous, full of fun and excitement, loves me dearly and etc”

Ok now the second question: How would you describe an ideal marriage partner?

Common answers would include, “Mature, got a sense of responsibility, cheerful, caring, understanding, honest, kind-hearted, having a financially stable income, knowledgeable, able to take good care of the family, loves me dearly and etc”

Notice the difference? An ideal dating partner and an ideal marriage partner is usually a very different person, perhaps just very a little in common I would say.

Well in a perfect case, an ideal partner should of course be best, both a dating and a marriage partner. Someone whom you enjoy dating, bringing you lots of fun, joy and excitements; at the same time someone whom is willing to share your problems and unhappiness, accepting all your negative habits and faults; committed to bringing you happiness.

But again, does such an ideal person exist? Can we really have both the pie and the cake? Think about it. Are we somehow setting too high an expectation? Unknowingly rejecting our chances? Losing the opportunity to be in love? Unknowingly bringing unhappiness to your relationship, yourself and your love? Hmm… well, do remember that we are afterall just talking about ideal here. Something, which is good to have, but not a must to have?

So before you are going to start complaining again that life is so unfair to you, ask yourself, “Have you really ever tried? Tried pursuing for happiness?”

Instead of always picking on your partner’s faults making life unhappy for both, have you tried looking at the other beautiful side of them, their beautiful qualities? Appreciating what you have already got? Tried improving on yourself instead, to becoming a better lover; a more ideal lover? Willing to open up yourself, giving both yourself and others a chance? Remember, what you expect of yours or your future partner is equally what he or she expects of you.

Going into a relationship is never a game. It is a long-term investment, an investment of love between the both of you. It is something which both have to genuinely think through and plan far. What would actually come after dating? Marriage is what I should suppose? Sharing the rest of your life, your future happiness with that special someone?

Well, if nothing were to go wrong in your relationship, your dating partner is eventually going to become your marriage partner, your life partner. Can I say so? Ok, to the girls, let me ask you a question. Would you share your happiness with someone that is full of fun and excitement to be with now, but deep down within yourself you know he is not going to be a good husband, someone who would not take good care of his family?

So again, what is your definition of an ideal partner? Someone whom truly love you, willing to share your problems and unhappiness or…? Well, the answer is within you. It has been with you all this while, only you can find the answer to this question. Your happiness belongs to you, nobody can decide for you. Be true to yourself, you should know what you really wants.

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Soulmate Connection

by: Robert Johannsen
We know there are magical signs once we meet our soulmates
face to face. Expect it to be not ordinary. Imagine a
fairy-tale coming alive. Most certainly, there would be
sparks flying, butterflies in the stomach, stuttered
sentences, ease of communication, physical attractions,
love-at-first-sights, answered prayers, love remembered from
dreams; in other words, a soulmate connection.

At first, the connection may be quite dream-like and a
little too overwhelming until it turns into a vague
familiarity. It may also be intense there may be no words to
describe it perfectly. Details of soulmate connections can
every so often overpower love itself. It’s spirit-lifting.
It’s addictive. It’s without doubt a “connection” between
two hearts. It’s beyond anything you have experienced.

Meeting your soulmate at this time and age is a rare gift,
one who’s interested needs to plumb the depths of all
possibilities, if not, just wait for it to happen. But for
some, waiting can be as dreadful as searching without
finding the “right one”. So might as well go for it and
enjoy every second of your “finding your soulmate
expedition”. At least, you will not tell yourself you did
not try.

Romance novels and studies on “finding your soulmate” have
it all- the unbelievable peaks and lows people go through
just to meet their soulmates. And their stories have all one
thing to say- once they have met their soulmates, it was as
if they have known and loved each other before. And they
can’t wait to spend their lives with each other forever.

With all these far-fetched concepts about soulmate
connection, who then do you think wouldn’t do anything for
love? If it’s that heavenly perfect, anyone will surely risk
anything just to experience it. How about you? How far would
you go for love?

It’s every girl’s dream for sure – to meet her soulmate and
experience a soulmate connection. Because if the feeling is
euphoric, why not? If meeting your soulmate is all you think
of and soulmate connection has captured your creative
imagination and loving heart, it becomes hard-wired into
your brain. It’s all you’re going to think of and focus on.
The best thing about finding your soulmate is that you will
love with a pure heart and with the cleanest intention to
give your all to that one special person.

Robert Johannsen MA is a psychology and freelance author
living in British Columbia. Robert's articles on Psychology,
Relationships and Popular Culture have been published in
numerous magazines in Canada, the US and the UK. His popular
Ebook, Proven Secrets for Attracting your Soulmate has
helped people from all walks of life find that special
someone since 2000.

Visit his recently updated website,
http://www.soulmate-secrets.com for a free chapter of his
powerful book.

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Romance On A Budget – Cheap Thrills Can Lead To A Lifetime Of Love

by: Heidi Richards
Romance isn’t about spending money, it’s about spending time together, spending energy and creativity to attract and keep the relationship exciting and the love alive. - Heidi Richards

Romance isn’t about how much money you lavish on another. It’s about attracting the object of your affection. Romance is about making dreams and fantasies come true. Romance is defined as “an exciting and mysterious quality; a relationship between two lovers.” It is the “act of making your partner feel loved.” Romance is more than an act, it’s a state of being. It’s the heart, the soul and the mind working together to create an adventure, and increase enthusiasm for one another.

“Romance means intimacy and connection, which means paying attention to detail. It’s making her lunch or giving him a massage. It’s making the bed together and cuddling. It’s holding hands and leaving little “love notes” around the house. It’s touching and feeling and listening and sharing. It’s excitement and serenity, spontaneity and planning. It’s telling the other person what you want, and doing the things the other person likes. It’s connecting deeply.

Romance is about timing, imagination, exploration and creativity. Being Romantic is about…. being creative, being willing to take a risk. Sometimes it’s being sweet. Sometimes it’s being silly. Romance is about … the right attitude. And attitude can cost you a little or a lot. True romantics have the right attitude; and use imagination to cultivate loving, sensual relationships.

So just how do you develop the right attitude? Start out with little acts of affection, little things to show you care and can be romantic. Here are a few suggestions (excerpted from the book, Romance on a Budget) to help you spark your imagination.

- This Kiss (#10) – You must remember this; a kiss is still a kiss… kiss often. Repeat several times.

- Look into My Eyes (#11) – When you gaze into each others eyes, everyone else seems to disappear. And looking intensely at one another can send a message to your lover that can lead to other things.

- You Light up my Life (#15) - Spray the perfume or cologne you wear on a light bulb. When the light is turned on the scent of you will fill the room.

- What a Feeling (#19) – Tell your love how much you appreciate him/her. Write your message on a post-it-note and stick it where it is sure to be found.

- Get out of your Comfort Zone (Intro) – Do something impulsive, even a little risky that will excite your lover and ignite the romance.

Like the song says “Love Don’t come easy.” I believe that “Romance Don’t Come Easy. “ But with a little practice and planning, the results can be thrillllllllling….

About the author: © 2004 - Heidi Richards is the author of The PMS Principles, Powerful Marketing Strategies to Grow Your Business and 7 other books. She is also the Founder & CEO of the Women’s ECommerce Association, International www.WECAI.org (pronounced wee-kī) – an Internet organization that “Helps Women Do Business on the WEB.” She can be reached at www.HeidiRichards.com.

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"Sleeping Woman"

by: Rick Parrott, MCP
Throughout the world there are certain constants that thread through mythology. Enduring love is one of the most popular.

Iztaccihuatl was the daughter of a great Aztec ruler in Mexico. She fell in love with Popocatepetl, one of her father's warriors.

When her father learned of their relationship, he sent her lover away to war in Oaxaca. Iztaccihuatl’s father told the young man, if he survived and returned he could take his daughter as his wife. Unfortunately, the devious emperor never intended for the young warrior to return and planned to marry Iztaccihuatl to another.

While Popocatepetl was away fighting, Iztaccihuatl was told he was dead. Her grief was so consuming she died of a broken heart. When Popocatepetl returned and discovered her death, he took Iztaccihuatl's body in his arms and carried her to the mountains.

Once there he placed her down on the ground and kneeling beside her died of grief. Taking pity, the gods covered them with a blanket of snow and transformed them into great mountains.

Today Iztaccihuatl is known as the "Sleeping Woman", because the mountain appears to be a woman lying on her side. The young warrior became Popocatepetl, or "Smoking Mountain", the volcano that still morns for the death of his lover.




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Be Glad That There’s Quarrel in Your Relationship

by: Rick Valens
Is your love relationship smooth? Have the both of you actually quarreled before? If your answer is yes, then you should be happy and be glad that it happened. But if your answer is however a no, then you should be aware of the danger that you are facing. Hmm… did I make things sound a bit too scary? Ha, it is not exactly that serious; don’t be scared off by me. Well, I should believe that the both of you are just, still in the sweet honeymoon period of your relationship.

In life, we encountered a lot of up and downs. But it is nevertheless, through all these problems and obstacles that we learn to stand up on our feet times and times again despite the falls we had, that made us what we are today. If life were to be so smooth for us, we wouldn’t have grown and learn to truly appreciate it. The same goes for love; if a relationship is ever so sweet and smooth, we wouldn’t have learn to really appreciate and cherish the love that is between ourselves and our love. It is through the overcoming of all those quarrels and problems, surviving them through together that we truly know that we deeply cherish the love that is between both, strengthening the relationship more than ever.

Be glad that there is quarrel between both. It actually means that the both have developed another step further in your relationship. It is only when one is closer to you that a quarrel will then actually happen. I don’t suppose you will pick up a quarrel with your partner whom you just started dating? You be just trying all out to please him or her instead, wouldn’t you?

But do however treat each and every quarrel seriously, especially when the both of you have just started. This is the time for you and your partner to further understand each other more deeply, the time for you to reflect on yourself and honestly think about the relationship. This is the time for the relationship to be tested. A test of your love for one another; whether this relationship is strong enough to withstand any thunderstorm there may be. Well, a survival never fails to further strengthen the relationship, truly cherishing each other ever more.

Avoid unnecessary reasoning at the point of a quarrel. Most of the times it will only make things worse, wait till both have cooled down. At the end of the day, always make an effort to find out what actually went wrong. Is it your fault? Talk to each other nicely, share your unhappiness; let your partner know how you felt. A softer tone is always more calming and pleasing to the ears. Your partner will usually be willing to listen and to share his or her feelings with you too. Sometimes it is out of too much care for one another that unwillingly trigger off a quarrel between both?

Remember, nobody wanted any quarrel. If you are at fault, please don’t be a stubborn donkey, you jolly well apologize and seek for your partner’s forgiveness. A word of sorry isn’t really that hard to say out? There is nothing ashamed to feel of, especially when with your love? Admit your fault, a sincere apology would always be pleasing to the ears; most of the time, harmony it will bring. Nonetheless, if your partner were to apologize to you, you graciously accept it. Why start another quarrel when you could end it? Well, there shouldn’t be any overnight grudges between couples.

Give each other a good hug. “I love you dear, I am really so sorry to have hurt you, please forgive me…” Now isn’t that such a sweet ending? It is usually through so that you understand each other better, cherishing each other even dearly. Remember, love is a two-way communication. It takes two happy persons, a happy you and your love to complete the equation.

Rick Valens
Staff Writer for http://www.loveletterbox.com ,
Love Relationship Discussion Forum

Currently also freelance writer for http://www.ecemetery.org,
Monument of Eternal Memory

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